


Couldn't Keep Up (You Were Falling Down)

by Idday



Series: Send My Love (To Your New Lover) [2]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Epistolary, M/M, Past Kent Parson/Jack Zimmermann, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-07
Updated: 2016-12-07
Packaged: 2018-09-07 01:19:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8777428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Idday/pseuds/Idday
Summary: Kent: We’re just leaving for Montreal now


  Kent: Can’t wait to see you again : )


  Jack: Okay see you soon


  Kent: Love you

…

  Kent: My mom wants to do a Draft Eve family dinner but then I’ll come up to your room and we can hang out


  Kent: Or we can “hang out”

…
Kent: Or not 
...
(Kent's phone, June 2009-June 2010.)





	

**Author's Note:**

> Kind of a pre-canon musing about Kent's head his first year in the NHL. Canon warnings for Jack's OD and past Jack/Kent. Technically a prequel to "We Gotta Let Go (Of All Of Our Ghosts)" and I would reading them in the posted order, but you won't need to have read that to understand this one at all!

_Kent: We’re just leaving for Montreal now_

_Kent: Can’t wait to see you again : )_

_Kent: And Jess feels the same_

_Kent: I think she has kind of a crush on you…_

_Kent: Too bad I got there first ; )_

_Jack: Okay see you soon_

_Kent: Love you_

…

_Kent: My mom wants to do a Draft Eve family dinner but then I’ll come up to your room and we can hang out_

_Kent: Or we can “hang out”_

…

_Kent: Or not_

…

_Jack: Kent wat if they dont draft mw_

_Kent: What? Jack you’re going first overall_

_Kent: Are you with your parents?_

_Kent: Are you with someone?_

_Jack: Knet_

_Jack: I cnt_

_Kent: Are you drunk?_

_Kent: I’m coming up_

…

_Kent: Jack open the door_

_Kent: Jack I’ve been knocking for like five minutes_

_Kent: Okay I’m going to the front desk to get a spare key_

…

CALL LOG—June 25, 2009—11:46 PM

911—EMERGENCY SERVICES

…

CALL LOG—June 25, 2009—11:57 PM

ALICIA ZIMMERMANN

…

_Kent: Please tell me he’s going to be okay_

_Kent: I tried to come in the ambulance but they wouldn’t let me_

_Alicia: They’re still not sure Kent_

_Alicia: I’ll let you know_

_Alicia: Get some rest, sweetheart, big day tomorrow_

…

GOOGLE SEARCH: blue pills overdose

GOOGLE SEARCH: overdose survivor

GOOGLE SEARCH: what is anxiety

GOOGLE SEARCH: my boyfriend has anxiety advice

GOOGLE SEARCH: my boyfriend lied to me about pills advice

…

_Kent: Call me when you can, okay?_

_Kent: Love you, Zimms_

...

_Alicia: The doctors say he’s going to be fine. You found him just in time._

_Alicia: Good luck today, Kent_

_Kent: Can I come see him after?_

_Alicia: I don’t think that’s a good idea right now_

_Alicia: I’ll let him know you asked after him_

…

_Bob: Congrats, kiddo_

_Bob: Alicia and I are very happy for you. Your mom must be proud._

_Kent: Did Jack see?_

_Bob: He’s sleeping right now._

_Kent: I’d like to come see him_

_Bob: You’re a good friend, Kent._

_Bob: Not yet._

…

_Kent: Your parents say I shouldn’t come see you_

_Kent: I really want to see you_

_Kent: We don’t have to do anything we can just talk or watch TV or whatever_

_Kent: I have to go back to New York soon and I can’t leave without seeing you_

…

_Alicia: I’m sorry about the things Jack said today_

_Kent: You told me not to come I should have listened_

_Alicia: He didn’t mean them_

_Alicia: He really is proud of you_

_Kent: sure_

…

_Kent: So I can play second string to you for my entire goddamn career and that’s fine but if you’re not winning than nobody deserves to?_

_Kent: Fuck you_

…

_Kent: I love you so goddamn much you motherfucker_

…

_Jack: I never loved you_

_…_

_Kent: I know_

_Kent: You never said it back_

…

_Alicia: Look, Jack’s getting pretty worked up and he really needs to focus on recovering right now. Maybe it would be best if you didn’t text him for a while._

_Alicia: I’m sorry, Kent, I know it doesn’t seem fair._

_Kent: Whatever’s best for Jack_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] so now you’re going to sic your mom on me?_

_Kent: [DRAFT] well how long is it going to be before I can talk to my best friend again?_

_Kent: [DRAFT] my BOYFRIEND_

_Kent: [DRAFT] I’m so goddamn scared, Jack_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Training camp started today and they were all pretending like it wasn’t supposed to be you here instead. I mean, fuck, Jack, they made crazy trades last season to tank and clear up that center spot for you and now they’re stuck with me on the wing._

_Kent: [DRAFT] Sometimes I think really mean things about how selfish you were to do that_

…

GOOGLE SEARCH: jack zimmermann

GOOGLE SEARCH: jack zimmermann news

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] I hate myself for not being able to help you_

…

_Kent: They want me to start on the Aces_

_Bob: That’s great news. I knew they would_

_Kent: How’s Jack?_

_Bob: It’s a journey but he’s doing okay_

_Kent: Do you think I could call him?_

_Bob: I don’t think that’s a good idea right now, Kent_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] The only other rookie is this Russian guy who speaks zero English. Sometimes when he’s looking at everyone speaking English trying to figure it out it reminds me of how I feel without you here. Like we had our own language and now nobody speaks mine anymore_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] I’m living with the captain, this guy Woody, and his wife and kids and he was like ‘I’d rather if you didn’t bring girls home around the kids’ like yeah that’s not exactly going to be a problem for me_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Not that I can actually tell anybody that besides you_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Not that I can tell you anything anyway_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] I played in my first NHL game and scored my first NHL goal like I’ve been dreaming about ever since I can remember and the only thing I could fucking think about was whether you were watching_

_Kent: [DRAFT] You fucked me up, Zimms_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] I’m rooming with that Russian rookie Mashkov on the road and it turns out that it’s not that bad because I can tell him pretty much anything and all he’s going to do is smile cluelessly_

_Kent: [DRAFT] In other news, he now knows pretty much everything about you_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Or he would, if he knew any English besides ‘hello’ and ‘okay’_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] I never thought I would miss anybody calling me Kenny but I guess things change, huh Jacky_

…

_Bob: What’s the verdict, kiddo?_

_Kent: Just a sprain_

_Kent: Maybe a few games_

_Kent: Thanks for checking in_

_Bob: You’re having a great season, Kent. Keep up the good work._

…

_Jack: Stop texting my dad_

_Kent: You can text mine, fair trade?_

_Kent: Sorry, that was a joke_

_Kent: A bad one, obviously_

_Kent: Whatever you want_

_Kent: It’s good to hear from you, Jack_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] NEWS FLASH YOU FUCKING PRICK HE TEXTED ME_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Just because you can’t look at him doesn’t mean we all hate him that much_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Sometimes I still dream about you in that bathroom_

_Kent: [DRAFT] usually I don’t make it in time in the dreams_

_Kent: [DRAFT] I guess I’d rather have you hate me than have you dead_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Even if I’m still not sure why you do_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Zims cn u plese just tel me wat I did?_

_Kent: [DRAFT] The lst time i was ths drunk u were to_

…

GOOGLE SEARCH: jack zimmermann

GOOGLE SEARCH: jack zimmermann pictures

GOOGLE SEARCH: jack zimmermann kent parson pictures

…

CALL LOG—NOVEMBER 29, 2009—3:07 AM

JACK ZIMMERMANN <3

…

_Kent: sorry_

…

_Bob: I was watching the game tonight, congrats on the hat trick kiddo_

_Bob: I’d love to buy you dinner the next time you play in Montreal_

_Kent: I don’t think Jack would like that_

_Bob: Just think about it. Let me worry about Jack_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Someone asked me the other day if you really did blow and I had to work so hard to keep from saying ‘no but he blows other stuff’_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Tater always comes over to watch cartoons with Woody’s kids and they help him with his English and it’s actually kinda cute_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Remember when I was trying to learn French in the Q and you always chirped me about having to read children’s books_

_Kent: [DRAFT] How come it took me this long to realize that made you kind of a dick?_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Not all of us were spoon fed French along with our silver plated skates you pretentious asshole_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] McCall just left for Philly and they want me to take his A_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Why is wearing the A for you more special than wearing it for an NHL team, huh?_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Why can’t I do anything without thinking of you??_

…

_Kent: We’re playing in Montreal next week and it would be cool to meet up_

_Jack: I don’t want to see you_

_Kent: I’m trying to respect your boundaries but I really miss you and would love to chat. You can pick the time, the place, anything_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Fuck you_

_Kent: [DRAFT] I still love you and I don’t know how to make it stop_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] There was only one other Russian guy on the team and he just got traded and he has to fly out tonight and we’re in the middle of this long road trip and he just came to say goodbye to Tater and they talked for a long time but now he’s gone and Tater’s trying to pretend he’s not crying and I don’t know what to do_

_Kent: [DRAFT] I guess I never was very good at being there for people_

_Kent: [DRAFT] It turns out crying into tubs of ice cream is pretty universal so I guess that worked_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Maybe I’m not so shitty at people_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Maybe I was just shitty at you_

…

GOOGLE SEARCH: how to learn russian

GOOGLE SEARCH: how to say hello in russian

GOOGLE SEARCH: english to russian translator

GOOGLE SEARCH: why is the russian alphabet so fucking stupid

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Tater’s the easiest guy to be around and we barely even speak the same language_

_Kent: [DRAFT] So why do I still want to be in your hotel room instead even though you’re a prickly bastard who hates my guts_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] So the guys nicknamed Mashkov ‘Tater’ earlier in the season and he finally asked me what it meant today and it took a while to make him understand but then he came back a few hours later and called me parsnip and he was so proud of himself and I can’t remember the last time I laughed like that_

_Kent: [DRAFT] The guys are all really cool actually_

_Kent: [DRAFT] And they actually acknowledge my existence on this mortal planet which is pretty underrated_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Looks like we’re going to make the playoffs_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Not that you care_

…

GOOGLE SEARCH: jack zimmermann

GOOGLE SEARCH: jack zimmermann kent parson

GOOGLE SEARCH: how to move on

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Look I know I wasn’t always perfect either but I don’t think I deserved the way you treated me_

_Kent: [DRAFT] You never had to love me back but why did you have to pretend like I ever meant anything_

…

GOOGLE SEARCH: toxic relationship

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] So I donated some money to this animal shelter because I saw a super sad TV ad about it and then they named a cat after me so of course I had to go adopt it and it’s the cutest thing but it has the stupidest name_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Woody won’t stop chirping me about it but it’s not like I did it_

_Kent: [DRAFT] At least he’s letting me have a cat in his house_

…

GOOGLE SEARCH: what is the best cat food

GOOGLE SEARCH: buy cat toys

GOOGLE SEARCH: is it weird that my cat makes me feel better

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Tater picked up last night and I was sexiled from my own hotel room for like an hour and Woody wouldn’t stop laughing when I had to hang in his room instead_

_Kent: [DRAFT] You never did that to me when we roomed together_

_Kent: [DRAFT] probably just because you were fucking me, though_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] I haven’t thrown up before a game since our first Memorial Cup run but I guess playoffs bring out the worst in me_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Do you remember what you told me that night?_

_Kent: [DRAFT] I don’t but I know it made me feel better_

_Kent: [DRAFT] At least Tater hugs me though, you were always so weird about touching me in public_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] This is some serious Notebook letter a day bullshit right here_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Somehow I don’t think you’re coming back for me though_

…

_Bob: Four wins down, kiddo_

_Bob: Keep your head up out there_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] I’m about to win a Calder and all people want to talk about is you_

_Kent: [DRAFT] you have an amazing ability to fuck me over from three thousand miles away_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] We’re halfway through and we have to play Chicago next_

_Kent: [DRAFT] Remember when WE were the dynamic duo nobody could stop talking about_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] It’s been a year and sometimes I still score a goal and look around to see your smile_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Tater’s just as nervous as I am for the finals and we stayed up talking all last night because neither of us could sleep even though we knew we should. Remember when we did that?_

_Kent: [DRAFT] His English is getting really good_

_Kent: [DRAFT] But now I can’t tell him anything about you or us so it’s basically down to just Kit_

_Kent: [DRAFT] That’s the cat_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] jut for teh record, winig the stanle y cup is sooooooooooooooo mchu bettr than the mem cup_

_Kent: [DRAFT] even wihtot u there_

_Kent: [DRAFT] so fuck you bcause u cnt take hockey ayaw from me_

_Kent: [DRAFT] I druck beer and CHMPANE out of the Stanley cup_

_Kent: [DRAFT] so mcuh beer_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Woody’s retiring_

_Kent: [DRAFT] The front office wants me to be captain_

_Kent: [DRAFT] They still think I’m you, Zimms_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Fuck that, I’m taking it anyway_

_Kent: [DRAFT] I didn’t steal your first overall and I didn’t steal your captaincy_

_Kent: [DRAFT] I earned them and you threw them away_

…

_Bob: I got your email about your cup day and Alicia and I would love to come down for it_

_Kent: Do you think Jack will make it?_

_Bob: He already has plans that week, sorry Kent_

_Kent: No worries, I understand_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] WHAT THE FUCK IS IT GOING TO TAKE FOR YOU TO BE HAPPY FOR ME_

…

_Kent: I know we haven’t talked for a while, but I hope you’re doing well. Let me know if you’d ever like to catch up._

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] Maybe I should just have my therapist call your therapist_

…

_Kent: [DRAFT] I guess it’s been a year. Happy fucking anniversary, Zimms._


End file.
